Key takeaways

  • Sexual orientation is about who you are attracted to; gender identity is your internal sense of your own gender; gender expression is how you present it outwardly — these are three separate things.
  • Self-identification comes first: the words a person uses for themselves take priority over any assumption based on how they look or behave.
  • India has its own long-standing terms — hijra, kothi, thirunangai, jogappa — with precolonial roots, so LGBTQ+ identity is not a Western import.
  • Singular 'they' is grammatically correct and centuries old; using someone's stated pronouns is basic respect, not a special favour.
  • Language evolves, and so will this list — when uncertain, ask respectfully and use the words the person uses for themselves.

Why language matters

The words we use for sexual orientation, gender and identity shape how people understand themselves and how respectfully others can engage with them. Good language makes experiences visible; vague or outdated language can erase them. This glossary is for two readers: LGBTQ+ people looking for words that fit, and friends, family and professionals who want to get it right.

A few simple principles guide respectful use:

  • Self-identification comes first. A person's own statement about their identity takes priority over assumptions based on appearance or behaviour.
  • Ask, then respect. When you are unsure which words apply to a specific person, ask kindly and use what they tell you.
  • Language keeps evolving. Terms current today may shift over time — that is normal for any living language.
  • Communities own their language. Some reclaimed words are fine for community members but not for outsiders. Respecting that boundary is part of respectful engagement.

India adds its own important layer. Indian languages carry terminology for gender and sexual diversity with deep precolonial history — hijra communities, for instance, have documented social and religious roles going back centuries. Contemporary Indian LGBTQ+ language blends these home-grown terms with global English ones. The 2014 NALSA judgment gave legal recognition to transgender identities, including specifically Indian terms, and professional frameworks such as the WPATH Standards of Care (SOC-8) and APA guidelines ground much of the clinical vocabulary used today.

This glossary is comprehensive but never exhaustive. Treat it as a starting point, not the final word.

Sexual orientation terms

Sexual orientation describes the pattern of sexual, romantic and emotional attraction a person feels toward others. For most people it is fairly stable across life, though some experience change over time. Orientation is about attraction — not about current relationship status. A broader walk-through of attraction and identity is in our guide to what sexuality means.

  • Heterosexual / straight: attraction primarily to people of a different gender. The most common orientation.
  • Gay: most often a man attracted to other men, though some women and non-binary people use it too.
  • Lesbian: a woman attracted to other women.
  • Bisexual / bi: attraction to more than one gender. A stable orientation in its own right — not a phase or a stepping stone — regardless of who someone is currently dating.
  • Pansexual / pan: attraction to people across the gender spectrum, where gender is not the deciding factor.
  • Asexual / ace: little or no sexual attraction to others. The asexual spectrum includes demisexual (attraction only after a strong emotional bond) and grey-asexual (occasional attraction). Asexuality is different from celibacy, which is a choice not to have sex.
  • Queer: an umbrella term reclaimed by many LGBTQ+ people. It is widely used for self-identification, though some older people who heard it mainly as a slur prefer not to use it.
  • Questioning: actively exploring one's orientation. Not having a fixed label is completely valid.

Romantic orientation is a separate dimension describing who you are drawn to romantically (heteroromantic, biromantic, aromantic and so on). For some people — especially in the asexual community — romantic and sexual orientations differ.

'Homosexual' is an older, clinical term now largely replaced by 'gay' and 'lesbian' in everyday self-identification.

Gender identity terms

Gender identity is a person's internal sense of their own gender — man, woman, both, neither, or something else. It is distinct from sex assigned at birth and from how someone expresses gender outwardly. The WPATH Standards of Care (SOC-8) is the leading clinical framework for understanding this diversity.

  • Cisgender / cis: gender identity matches the sex assigned at birth.
  • Transgender / trans: gender identity differs from the sex assigned at birth. A trans man was assigned female at birth and is a man; a trans woman was assigned male at birth and is a woman. Their identities are full and complete — 'trans' describes the path, not a lesser version. Being trans does not require any particular medical or social steps.
  • Non-binary / enby: a gender outside the man/woman binary — it can mean both, neither, or somewhere in between. It is a genuine identity, not a midpoint between two others.
  • Genderqueer: close to non-binary, with slightly different political and historical roots; usage varies by person.
  • Gender-fluid: a gender that shifts over time.
  • Agender: having little or no sense of gender.
  • Bigender / demigender: identifying as two genders, or partially with a gender (e.g. demiboy, demigirl).
  • Intersex: born with sex characteristics (chromosomes, hormones, anatomy) that do not fit typical male or female definitions. Intersex is about biology and is separate from being transgender, though a person can be both.

AFAB / AMAB stand for Assigned Female / Male At Birth. They describe the birth assignment without assuming anything about a person's gender identity — useful in healthcare when anatomy matters. If you want a deeper look at the distinction, see our explainer on sex, gender and identity.

Two important Indian terms appear in this category too — hijra and kothi — covered fully in the India section below. A wider guide to legal recognition, hormones and healthcare is in trans women's health in India.

Gender expression terms

Gender expression is how a person presents gender outwardly — through clothing, mannerisms, voice and style. It is separate from gender identity: a person of any gender can express themselves in masculine, feminine or androgynous ways, and expression does not reveal someone's identity.

  • Masculine / feminine / androgynous: presentation that leans toward conventional manhood, womanhood, or a neutral or mixed blend. What counts as 'masculine' or 'feminine' varies by culture and era.
  • Butch / femme: terms with deep history in lesbian and queer women's communities for more masculine (butch) or more feminine (femme) expression, often carrying specific aesthetic and political meaning.
  • Drag (drag queen / king): a performance art using exaggerated gender expression. Drag is about performance, not identity — performers may have any gender identity.
  • Gender-nonconforming / gender-variant: expression that does not match conventional expectations.
  • Passing: in trans contexts, being perceived as one's identified gender. It is a contested idea — valued by some, critiqued by others for centring outside perception.
  • Stealth: living without disclosing one's transgender history. A personal choice, not an obligation in either direction.

Use these with care: 'passing' and 'stealth' mean different things to different people, so let the individual's own relationship to the words guide you.

Relationship and family terms

LGBTQ+ relationships and families take many shapes, and the vocabulary has grown to reflect that.

  • Same-gender / different-gender couple: 'different-gender' is increasingly preferred over 'opposite-sex' because gender is not a strict binary.
  • Chosen family: the people who become family through love and commitment rather than blood or marriage — especially important when a family of origin is not supportive.
  • Coming out: the ongoing process of disclosing an LGBTQ+ identity. It is not one event but many, across different relationships and over a lifetime. Real-life accounts are gathered in our coming out stories collection, and the specifically Indian dimensions — family, safety, timing — are explored in coming out in India.
  • Closeted: not having disclosed one's identity, which can vary by context (out to friends, not to family).
  • Outing: disclosing someone's identity without consent. This is a harm — each person has the right to control their own disclosure.

Several terms name the pressures LGBTQ+ people face:
  • Heteronormativity / cisnormativity: treating heterosexual or cisgender as the default and everything else as an exception.
  • Homophobia, biphobia, transphobia: fear, prejudice or hostility toward gay, bisexual or transgender people respectively. Bisexual people often face biphobia from both straight and gay communities.
  • Marriage equality: legal recognition of same-gender marriage on equal terms. In India, the Supreme Court declined to recognise it through the courts in October 2023 and suggested it is a matter for Parliament; advocacy continues. For family-building options today, see LGBTQ family allyship in India and our guide to gender-inclusive parenting, adoption and fertility rights.

Pronouns and inclusive language

Pronouns are the words we use to refer to someone in the third person, and they can affirm or undermine a person's gender. Asking and then using someone's pronouns consistently is basic respect.

  • She/her, he/him: feminine and masculine pronouns, used by cis and trans people alike based on identity.
  • They/them (singular): gender-neutral pronouns used by many non-binary, gender-fluid and agender people. Singular 'they' has been correct English for centuries and is endorsed by the AP Stylebook, Chicago Manual of Style and Merriam-Webster.
  • Multiple pronouns (e.g. she/they): some people are comfortable with more than one set — ask which to use when.
  • Neopronouns (e.g. ze/zir, xe/xem): newer pronouns some people prefer; a brief explanation may help others learn them.

A few practical habits make a real difference:
  • Ask naturally: "What pronouns do you use?" Sharing your own first normalises it.
  • Correct mistakes briefly: acknowledge, fix, move on — no long apology needed.
  • Add pronouns to email signatures and name tags so trans and non-binary people are respected without having to announce their identity each time.
  • Use neutral wording like 'folks' instead of 'guys', and neutral anatomical language ('chest', 'genitals') in healthcare to avoid assumptions — an approach the WPATH SOC-8 supports.

Indian languages add nuance: Hindi has gendered pronouns and verb forms, while some Indian languages mark gender lightly or not at all. Trans and non-binary Indians often navigate this across several languages, and community-led work is steadily adapting inclusive language for each. Community-led work is steadily building inclusive language for people who menstruate across India's many languages.

Key LGBTQ+ concepts to know

Beyond identity labels, a handful of concepts come up often in LGBTQ+ conversations and healthcare.

  • Gender dysphoria: the distress that can arise when gender identity and assigned sex (or how one is perceived) do not match. It appears in the DSM-5 and ICD-11. Importantly, not every trans person experiences it. Our honest, first-person guide to what gender dysphoria feels like goes deeper.
  • Gender euphoria: the positive feeling of being seen and recognised as your true gender — the affirming counterpart to dysphoria.
  • Transitioning: the steps some trans people take to align their life and body with their gender. It can be social (name, pronouns, presentation), medical (hormones, surgery) or legal (documents) — and no two journeys look the same. A grounded India-specific overview is in hormone therapy facts in the Indian context.
  • Affirming care: healthcare that supports, rather than questions, a person's LGBTQ+ identity. It is the evidence-based standard endorsed by the APA, WPATH and others. To find it, see how to find an LGBT-affirming therapist or doctor.
  • Conversion therapy: any attempt to change someone's orientation or gender identity. It is condemned as harmful and ineffective by every major medical body. In India, the National Medical Commission's August 2022 directive explicitly bans it as professional misconduct.
  • Minority stress: the framework (developed by Ilan Meyer) explaining that LGBTQ+ mental-health disparities come from chronic discrimination and stigma — not from being LGBTQ+. It underpins much of LGBTQ mental health in India.
  • Intersectionality: Kimberlé Crenshaw's idea that overlapping identities (caste, gender, class, sexuality, disability) combine in specific ways — a theme of caste, gender and care that shapes many Indian LGBTQ+ lives.
  • Sex versus gender: sex refers to biological characteristics; gender to identity, expression and role. Both are more varied than a simple binary.

Several Indian legal landmarks shape the vocabulary too: Section 377 (the colonial-era law criminalising consensual same-sex relations, read down by the Supreme Court in 2018), the NALSA judgment (2014, recognising transgender persons' rights), and the Transgender Persons Act (2019).

Indian-specific LGBTQ+ terms

India's LGBTQ+ vocabulary blends global English terms with home-grown words that carry centuries of history. Recognising this matters — it directly counters the false idea that queer identity is a Western import. Indian gender and sexual diversity is documented in classical literature (including the Kama Sutra) and across religious and historical texts.

  • Hijra: the best-known Indian non-binary identity, with documented presence across the subcontinent for centuries and specific cultural and religious roles, including blessings at births and weddings. Hijra communities have their own lineages (gharanas), vocabulary and traditions. Hijra is a genuine identity recognised in the 2014 NALSA judgment and the Transgender Persons Act 2019 (though community advocates have criticised parts of that Act). The term is used by community members; outsiders should use it with care.
  • Kothi: often refers to feminine-presenting people assigned male at birth; the term features heavily in Indian sexual-health and HIV-prevention work.
  • Panthi: sometimes used for masculine-presenting men who have sex with men, distinguished from kothi by presentation and role.
  • Aravani / thirunangai: Tamil terms for transgender women. 'Aravani' is the older word; 'thirunangai' is the contemporary, community-preferred term used by the Tamil Nadu Transgender Welfare Board.
  • Jogappa / jogti / jogamma: identities in some South Indian traditions tied to religious devotion (often to the goddess Yellamma) and specific gender roles.

Which words an individual prefers varies widely — some Indians embrace traditional terms, some prefer global English ones, and many switch depending on context. As always, self-identification comes first. For health needs specific to communities, see trans women's health in India and health for lesbian and bisexual women in India.

How language keeps changing

LGBTQ+ language is alive — it shifts as communities articulate new experiences, and that is a feature, not a flaw.

  • Terms change meaning. 'Queer' was once mainly a slur and is now a common self-identifier; 'gay' once meant 'carefree' before settling into today's usage.
  • New terms emerge. As people name experiences that always existed, new vocabulary appears. The terms support recognition; they do not invent the experiences.
  • Some terms date. 'Homosexual' has largely given way to 'gay' and 'lesbian'; 'transsexual' to 'transgender' — though some older people keep the earlier words for themselves, which is their right.
  • Communities own reclaimed words. Terms reclaimed from slurs may be fine within a community but not for outsiders to use.
  • Regional variation is real. Indian, American and British LGBTQ+ language differ, and India itself varies region to region.
  • Generations differ. People often use the vocabulary that was current when they came out, so respectful engagement across ages sometimes means meeting different word choices with grace.

When you are unsure, the rule is simple and always works: ask respectfully, and use the words the person uses for themselves.

Putting this glossary to use

A glossary is a starting point, not a substitute for real engagement. Here is how to use it well in different settings.

  • Exploring your own identity? Let terms that resonate help you find language for your experience. You do not need a fixed label to be valid, and the right word may change over time.
  • Supporting someone in your life? Use this for general understanding, but ask that specific person about their own words and pronouns.
  • A professional — clinician, teacher, employer? Apply it to forms, policies and everyday interactions, alongside neutral, affirming language.
  • Engaging with media or advocacy? It helps you follow conversations and contribute respectfully.

Indian resources for ongoing learning include the Naz Foundation, Humsafar Trust, Sappho for Equality, TARSHI, Mariwala Health Initiative and Sahodaran. For families, the Sweekar parent-support network offers guidance — a journey covered warmly in LGBTQ family allyship in India. Global resources include WPATH for transgender care, the APA for LGBTQ+ psychology, and GLAAD for media.

The long-term framework is steady, humble learning — reading current community resources, paying attention to the people in your life, and adapting as language grows. To keep going, our guides to being an LGBT ally and LGBT parenting in India are good next steps.

LGBTQ+ language myths, corrected

Myth: LGBTQ+ terms are Western imports irrelevant to India

  • False. Indian gender and sexual diversity has documented precolonial history with its own terminology and social roles. Hijra communities have existed across the subcontinent for centuries; kothi, panthi, jogappa, aravani and thirunangai are all home-grown identities. Same-sex relationships appear in classical Indian literature and religious texts.
  • Contemporary Indian LGBTQ+ language blends these long-standing terms with global English ones, creating a context that is both Indian and globally connected. The 'Western import' claim is historically inaccurate and is sometimes used to delegitimise Indian LGBTQ+ people.

Myth: There are too many gender terms and they are 'made up'

  • The growing list of terms reflects people articulating experiences that exist whether or not a word is widely known. The words support communication and self-understanding; they do not create the experiences.
  • Feeling there are 'too many terms' usually reflects discomfort with human diversity rather than a real problem with language. All language evolves — LGBTQ+ vocabulary is simply part of that ongoing process.

Myth: Singular 'they' for one person is grammatically wrong

  • False. Singular 'they' has been used in English for centuries, including by Shakespeare. The AP Stylebook, Chicago Manual of Style, Merriam-Webster and the APA style guide all endorse it.
  • The resistance is usually discomfort with non-binary identity dressed up as a grammar rule. Using a person's stated pronouns, including singular 'they', is both correct and respectful.

Myth: I should avoid LGBTQ+ terms in case I cause offence

  • Understandable, but avoidance creates its own harm — treating LGBTQ+ topics as too sensitive to mention reinforces stigma. Some reclaimed or culturally specific terms do call for care, but that is not a reason to avoid all language.
  • The respectful approach is informed engagement: use widely accepted terms (gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender) in appropriate contexts, ask individuals about their own words, mirror the language they use for themselves, and correct mistakes gracefully when they happen. Learning beats avoiding.

When to see a doctor or reach out for support

A glossary is about language, but identity intersects with real health and wellbeing. Consider reaching out to an affirming professional if:

  • Distress about your gender or sexuality feels persistent or overwhelming, or interferes with daily life, sleep, appetite or relationships.
  • You are considering medical transition — hormone therapy or surgery — and want accurate, India-specific information and supervised care.
  • You are experiencing low mood, anxiety, or thoughts of self-harm. Minority stress is real and treatable; you deserve support, not silence.
  • You have faced discrimination, harassment or violence and need mental-health or legal help.
  • You want family-affirming healthcare — contraception, STI screening, fertility or pregnancy care — that respects your identity.

Start with an affirming clinician using our guide on how to find an LGBT-affirming therapist or doctor. In a mental-health crisis in India, you can call the government Tele MANAS helpline on 14416. If you have experienced sexual violence, our guide I was touched without consent — now what? outlines your next steps. Seeking help is a sign of strength, never weakness.

Frequently asked questions

What is the difference between sexual orientation and gender identity?

Sexual orientation is about who you are attracted to (for example gay, bisexual, asexual). Gender identity is your internal sense of your own gender — man, woman, both, neither or something else. They are completely separate: a trans person can be straight, gay, bisexual or any orientation, just like anyone else.

Is it rude to ask someone their pronouns?

No — asking respectfully is the considerate thing to do, and far better than guessing. A simple "What pronouns do you use?" works well, and sharing your own first makes it feel natural. The mistake to avoid is assuming pronouns from someone's appearance.

What does 'cisgender' mean?

Cisgender (or 'cis') describes someone whose gender identity matches the sex they were assigned at birth — for example, a person assigned female at birth who identifies as a woman. It is simply the counterpart to 'transgender' and is standard, neutral terminology.

Are hijra and transgender the same thing?

They overlap but are not identical. Hijra is a specific Indian identity with its own centuries-old cultural, social and religious traditions and community structures. Some hijra individuals also describe themselves as transgender; others prefer 'hijra' or regional terms like thirunangai. As always, follow the words each person uses for themselves.

What is the difference between bisexual and pansexual?

Both involve attraction to more than one gender. Many bisexual people define bisexuality as attraction to two or more genders, while pansexual people often emphasise that gender is not a deciding factor in their attraction at all. There is real overlap, and which word someone uses is a personal choice.

Is using singular 'they' for one person grammatically correct?

Yes. Singular 'they' has been used in English for centuries and is endorsed by major style guides including the AP Stylebook, Chicago Manual of Style and Merriam-Webster. Using it for someone who asks you to is both grammatically correct and respectful.

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